Endings and Beginnings…

Endings and Beginnings…

I think I’ve told this story before. When I first started this blog, I didn’t really know what to expect from it, hence the name of “Randoms by a random“. It slowly evolved into a poetry blog with the gradual addition of mental health advocacy through the series “Mental health Friday”. I always wondered how people wrote flash fictions, little did I think I would be one of those who wrote them as well, all thanks to Flash fiction for aspiring writers weekly challenge. This blog has been an adventure, filled with so many amazing people. I never would have thought I’d make the lifelong friends I made here.

With that being said, I feel it’s time for me to take a break. This was inevitable, seeing that I have been finding it hard to keep up with the blog this year. It’s not all bad though, I do have good news, but you’ll have to wait till the end to find out what it is.

I started this blog when I was in my 3rd year of medical school and I am happy to say I have finally gotten my practicing license now, Thank God. And now that I’m done with that stress, and while awaiting the next phase of my life, I’ve decided to try something different. 

Last month, I created an instagram account, where I will still be posting my poems (@ameena_kg) and for the time being, I wouldn’t be putting up any new posts on this blog. I will definitely come back, but I’ve just been finding it difficult to keep up this blog at the moment. 

Now, to the big news, I finally created a self hosted website, its called “all things Ameena”, I want to focus on that for now. I wouldn’t post there as often as I did here, as quality not quantity would be the key. It’s supposed to be a lighthearted blog, which chronicles everything Me, with a touch of humor. Do subscribe to that ( and you need not worry, I wouldn’t be blowing up your email with daily posts).

Thanks for joining me in this 4 year journey, again, this is not goodbye, this is simply a break I’m taking. I’d be back to this blog hopefully, with some interesting news. Until then, let’s connect through instagram (@ameena_kg) I’d still be posting poetry there and also, don’t forget to subscribe to the new website-  All Things ameena

Begin Again-

Begin Again-

 

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At the back of my mind, I always knew that, It, this, could come to an end.

I could die,
He could die,
He could leave…
And I know this might seem a morbid thought to many. But, there has always been a spot of realism amidst my fairytale romanticism filled life.

I try to keep a little spot, save a little grey in my rainbow, in order to remind myself about the reality of life.

I refuse to live in a world filled with illusions and the delusion that endings is not a possibility.

I want to be able to say: I am okay and I am fine with endings now because I know I can always begin again.

Endings-

Endings-

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My breaking was my becoming,
But i didnt know it then;
Built an ocean from my tears
Watched its waves rise up and crash,

I Stood at the shore and wandered
Of the nothings i have left,
While the ocean i had built up,
Watched me break torrentially.

I thought that I had nothing
But here’s an ocean calling me,
I could sail to all the everythings,
I’ve always wanted to see.

But the thing I learnt of sorrow
Is It never lets you see,
That endings aren’t doors closing,
Sometimes endings are the keys.

 

Goodnight-

Goodnight-

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I knew the love wasn’t there anymore, when he’d end with just “goodnight”. A sign so trivial, only a better half can be expected to notice- and I did.
Goodnight, he said simply. Without any accompaniment; no dear to lighten it, no honey to sweeten it. And I knew, it was only a matter of time before even the goodnight would vanish.

It wasn’t the ending that hurt. It was- watching everything evaporate right before my eyes, watching a marriage collapse, brick by brick. Seeing the sand grains float to the ground and knowing there was nothing I could do about it. He had made his choice… for us.

facebook page: words of a random. Let’s connect!

Endings & Beginnings

Endings & Beginnings

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I started with poetry,
And ended with prose;
Started with you-
Ended alone.

I started with a diary,
And ended with words-
Filling up pages,
Of fiction genre.

I started with bullet holes,
Now ending with cracks;
Mended by friends,
I didn’t think I’d have.

I started from somewhere,
And ending elsewhere;
What went on in between –
Is another story to tell.

But I started, I started,
Trudged through life’s mud;
Cause endings are much better,
Than where the story begins.

the above is courtesy of Marc and Angel

Closure-

Closure-

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Why spend all your time writing? He asked
To create endings, she replied.

He never could understand and she never could explain. And on she wrote, till he tired of asking. How could she explain her search for closure in words. She wrote and created endings- some happy, some sad, some unexpected and some a replica of status quo, all in the hope that someday, the void left by the numerous souls who departed her life without goodbyes would be filled.

She kept on writing, in search of the closures she never had.

image credit: Picslist.com