The girl with the black veil-

The girl with the black veil-

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Yes she will smile and,
Yes she’ll say thank you;
But only when needed,
And that’s all she uttered.

Yes she would walk and,
Go into classrooms;
But thats all she went to,
And only when needed,

She walked with her head high,
Her blue eyes looked downcast;
A black veil her trademark,
We named her dark widow.

But no one, yes no one
Even once tried to get her,
To open the world, we all
Knew she held within her.

Her frail body floated,
Under layers of clothing,
The nickname travelled fast
But she walked on unbothered,

Until the day she didn’t,
The girl with the black veil,
The news came as a shock,
Our dark widow had passed on.

We found out the reason,
She hid behind a black veil,
Leukaemia- they called it,
Her cells were killing her.

We prayed for Azmeena,
We wept for her departure,
She fought all alone,
And we did nothing to help her.


This is something I wrote as a free-write literally now, Just to keep the muse going. If you are not a fan of rhyming, feel free to ignore this. 🙂

the above image Is courtesy of  Emaho magazine.com

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Of all the lights-

Of all the lights-

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All the light,
She may not see;
The cries at night,
From her baby’s lips;
Too weak to help-
She breaks within.

Six months of chemo,
To save her skin;
Her lymphos attacking-
The Rbcs’;
It’s you against you-
A battle steep.

Hope is as long as,
the heart- beats.
Survive for her daughter-
She strives to win;
Leukemia or not,
Fight it out- she will.
The end maybe near-
It’s not gotten yet-
The light at the end-
She’s determined, she’ll see.

I dedicate this to a warrior I know. I love you and you’ll get through this. This is just a journey, not the end. I also dedicate this to every single person who has battled or is battling. I leave you with this message- 

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AGOS: Summer’s home coming

AGOS: Summer’s home coming

“Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul-
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all-“

This was the quote that greeted me on a brown rustic wooden board that stood beside Sam’s door. Stepping out of the car, I stood for a moment, inhaling the jolly sweet rusty smell of after-rain which evaporated from the sand In the mini gardens. The sky was mostly cloudless with only a few light clumps of clouds here and there, and even those were shady. The unwelcoming rays of the sun penetrated through my skin, a hot 35 degrees; I was home. It had rained the previous day, no wonder the weather was so hot.

“Need any help?” George’s voice snapped me out of my daydream.

He stood a little behind me, grinning as I turned to face him. He knew pretty well I hadn’t even started offloading yet, I was lost in thoughts.

“Hey, don’t mock the cancer girl, doc. I’m hurting enough already you know.” I replied back, gently grasping at the upper part of my blouse where I knew my heart was.

He laughed, “Oh, so you’re playing the cancer card now huh, good thing I’m immune.” We both laughed.

Dr George Sandow’s an old friend of mine. He was the one who diagnosed me with my Meningioma and helped me through the first few months of coming to terms with having a tumor growing in my brain. Ever since then, we became tight friends even with an age gap of about 12 years. I remember when I was leaving town, he told me
“This is your home Summer, and when your home comes calling, you know where to find me.”

When I called him the other day that I had decided to come back, his voice rose to a high pitch as he exclaimed,
“I’m glad you took it literally Summer.”
Perks of living in a small town, everybody knew everybody and everybody got emotionally invested in everybody’s business.

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A Glimpse of Summer: Summer’s Story

A Glimpse of Summer: Summer’s Story

My name is Summer and I am dying… It took me a long time to get a grip over this fact but now I have and it doesn’t hurt as much anymore. Five years ago, I got diagnosed with Meningioma which is a brain tumor. I was only twenty six. It turned out, the severe morning headaches and visual disturbances which I had attributed to migraines, were due to a tumor in my brain. My life ended and began on the day I got diagnosed. I remember the doctor saying “there is hope”, the prognosis was good and “most” people had a good chance of survival. I kept it a secret from my two best friends- Kit and Sam. The oncologist had said I had a good chance of surviving, so I thought, why worry them. I had planned on revealing my diagnosis to them after the treatment began, but then, somewhere along the line, something changed.

A few months into treatment (which was really hard to keep a secret from my prodding best friend Kit), more tests and scans were performed to check the progress of the tumor. It wasn’t good. The treatment wasn’t working, the tumor was steadily growing bigger and basically- I was among the unlucky few.

The doctor explained to me in the most basic of terms, saying, they had to change treatment methods due to the increase in growth of the tumor. More “aggressive” tactics had to be employed which meant more and worse side-effects. He didn’t add that part, but experience taught me. Severe abdominal pain, nausea- and a whole lot of other life- inconveniencing pain.

I knew I had to tell Sam and Kit because either way, sooner or later, they would find out. Weight loss, mood swings and especially sudden vomiting weren’t things that could be easily hidden. Or even, a patch of “no hair” in the head due to biopsy- that hurt me a lot because I love my hair. And then, Sam broke the news that he and Julie were getting married and I thought it best not to disrupt their happiness and be the bringer of bad news.

But the truth was, that was just an excuse. I was scared, petrified, and in an emotional roller coaster. I had seen what cancer had done to my mother, and even though I knew I wasn’t her, thinking back to the pity state she was in, the “poor thing” look people gave her, I didn’t want that. I didn’t want to be reminded every single day that I was a walking time bomb who could pass out, flare up or even leave at any moment. It is in human nature for us to feel sorry for our fellow humans when they are going through a rough patch. I get it, but at the same time, I didn’t want that.

I wanted to leave the image of a lively good old Summer, the girl who believed the world was her oyster, who loved her friends beyond the moon, who was happy despite hidden wounds. I wanted people to remember me as “the real me” and not the cancerous version of me. At times, I felt so mad that I could curse “cancer” itself, whatever it is. But it is still me. This cancer is part of me, it is formed from my cells, my genes! Read more

Part 1: A Glimpse Of Summer

Part 1: A Glimpse Of Summer

                     Twitter guy- that’s what she liked to call him.
Summer and Twitter guy first had contact in April through a surprising source, poetry blog. I know! They clicked over poetry. Exchange of Twitter Ids took place soon, and in a short while they were tight twitter buddies. The beauty about their relationship or rather friendship was that, right from the start- it was nothing romantic. It was, as they say, purely a poetic instinct that led them to such a budding friendship.

Summer and Samuel became such tight friends that I, as Her female best friend had to constantly remind them that I am still in the picture.
Now that you’ve heard about me, my name is Kit, I am summer’s best friend and this is my version of their story:-

Sam was a perfect gentleman though a little bit of a dreamer and summer was an all out rock star with a huge savings account; all thanks to a dead aunt. Complete opposites that surprisingly clicked. Sam meant the second best thing to Summer, well of course the first is moi!

They were each other’s rock through the roller coaster called college and the travails that came with it. Most of which were unexpected. Sam was the one who broke the news to summer that summer’s mum had stage IV cancer. Summer’s mum knew the news would break summer and so couldn’t bring herself to tell her; Sam ended up being the messenger. And together, we stuck to her through what was the worst phase of her life- summer’s mum didn’t survive long after the diagnosis.

As Sam was also an orphan, when he finally decided to get engaged to his long time girlfriend, Julie. Summer went above and beyond to make sure everything was perfect, exactly the way his mother would have wanted it to be. Another thing they had in common- Sentiments to motherhood.

Summer was a shell, hard on the outside yet fragile within. But Sam, he was one of those guys that kind of let things roll off their backs; he didn’t take minor details too seriously. And that, was his biggest mistake.

College over- sam’s wedding was drawing near and summer was, as always, doing her ultimate to make the event a blast and at the same time driving me nuts with wedding details. She was the one to stand beside Sam as his best man after a lot of persuasion from him. Summer was basically motherzilla but deep down, i knew she was breaking, one piece at a time. I didn’t know for how long she could endure.

Summer realized she was in love with Sam – I don’t know what happened, or what snapped to made her finally understand the feeling but she did. This was before the planning had taken much shape. I told her it wasn’t too late but there was something she said that made me rethink:
” have you seen the way they look at each other, even when no one’s watching”
“Would you want to be the cause for the end of such happiness”.

I knew I wouldn’t and neither would she- Selflessness was our damn.

This is the first part of a short fiction series I’m writing. I hope you like it. Comments and feedback  are highly appreciated. Stay tuned for part two 😉