And I smile-

And I smile-


When I think of him, I smile. I smile at my naivety, which some may call, stupidity. I smile at the insane idea, I could have anything- just, about anything. Beauty, brains, career, every single dream accomplished and still have that love by my side. Who was I kidding. I could try, I did try… The moment I grasped one, another slipped right through my fingers. And I smile, I can’t help but smile… It’s the only way I can breathe in air without drops falling out of my eyes.

“It’s me or it”, he said with eyes reflecting the winter weather- they were white and cold, nothing like I’d ever seen. I smile cause I didn’t see it coming. It was either him or it- he placed me in a position to make a ludicrous choice. But to me- he was never a choice, never an option, always a definite.

And at that moment, standing at the junction- I could see his bus moving. He never wanted to stay in the first place. And I let him go… He fluttered away like a newly hatched butterfly and I stood there, trying to make sense with the little rationale left of me. “What just happened?” I found myself asking rhetorically, time after time after time; The only answer- Maybe, they were right. Maybe, I can’t have it all at the same time.Β 

Image courtesy of :Β Chapter of my lifeΒ on tumblr.

26 thoughts on “And I smile-

  1. Only you can make my heart feel sad but yet at the same time struck by the beauty of how you express yourself! “Only way I can breathe in the air without drops falling out of my eyes!” Love that line!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hmmm, he sounds like the situation where she is sad not about losing him in particular but love. Losing at the chance of forming a bound but he does not sound like he was on the road of permanence in her life. May I be indiscreet and say she is glad that he ask her to choose career or.him, so she could get rid of him.

    Liked by 1 person

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